Angela-isms, Realness

Going sober

I’ve decided to quit alcohol.

Today I woke up feeling fresh and ready to take on the day, as I type its currently 9.30am and I’ve already done 3 loads of washing, the same however, can’t be said for last Sunday.  Last Sunday, I had a hangover, I felt rough, I was sick, it was my Mums birthday and I’d promised to make dinner for the whole family, a task that I literally scraped through and couldn’t even face the end result.  It was tough and I lost count of how many times I said ‘I’m never drinking again!‘  I almost meant it.  Until I forgot how awful I had felt and called Kevin after work on Friday proclaiming ‘I’ve had a nightmare day could you pick me up some wine!

He brought me wine (I know he’s a keeper) and said ‘You’re “never drinking again” lasted long…a whole week!’… I let that one slide, because he brought the wine.

He was right though, I didn’t drink the wine and I’ve decided not to drink alcohol again….until after the Marathon,  21st May, maybe forever, but my goal for now is May 21st.

My relationship with alcohol has been turbulent, not in a ‘Hi my name is Angela and I’m an alcoholic’ kind of way but more an on-off relationship, I can’t handle my drink, I am a self confessed light-weight, a cheap date if you will.  I also, like most, am a binge drinker.

When my friends started drinking we were underage, I was too scared to join them (I saw how much trouble my older sister got in, ha) They made fun of me for it but were always grateful when I got them home ok and kept them out of too much trouble.

When we were old enough (but probably still underage) I’d go out to bars with them at the weekend and maybe have one drink, an alcopop or a beer but never enough to get drunk.  On occasion I’d have a little more and I’d vomit, I’m not one of those people who can throw up then just get back to the party.  I gotta go home and I’m sick the whole day after.

I didn’t really drink as I hated the way it made me feel, I could never work out how much I could handle as it seemed to differ all the time, so it was easier not to bother.

A doctor once told me to take the children’s dosage on a medication because I was so small…. can I have a kids G’n’T please?!!

University is a very sociable place,  it was difficult not to drink , I was probably out in town with friends most nights (I didn’t drink EVERY night) and it was so inexpensive that alcohol could cost less than soft drinks- 50p vodkas in the Meadowpark on a Tuesday became our thing, we literally would ask for a pint glass with triple vodka and top it up with lemonade – it cost £2 and was a sure fire way for you to not realise how much you’d had.

Like most of my friends,  there were more than a few student days spent, regretting drinking too much, regretting drunken fumbles, regretting drunken tumbles, regretting saying something or texting someone you shouldn’t have whilst drunk. The Fear is real guys! No real regrets though, we had the time of our lives, total embarrassment regularly but mistakes are how we all learn, right?

After university I didn’t drink much again, real job and a serious relationship and all that.  I still went out with friends but only occasionally.  I still couldn’t handle my drink so more often than not I’d be designated driver.  I didn’t need a drink to have a great time.  Sometimes, however, I would have a drink and occasionally that meant I’d end up in some silly state of being asleep (not good in a nightclub), a stumbling mess or being sick and I’d always pay for it the next day.

Some nights I paid for more than others…

This was the day after my friends 30th, 5 years ago.  I tried to get a piggy back from her husband but he was drunk too and I somehow ended up face planting concrete.  I can’t even explain how embarrassed or ashamed I felt to go to the hospital to get checked the next day, or going to work on the Monday with a face like that, not to mention the looks that Kevin would receive.  My stomach turns every time I look at that picture I escaped with a a fractured eye socket but it could have easily had a very different outcome.  Why I didn’t stop drinking there and then I’ll never know!

I’ve taken part in dry January and sober October because really I could go months without drinking it was not a challenge, I’m sure I’ve even gone a year without drinking just by accident. I was never really too fussed.

Until I turned 30 that is…

I celebrated turning 30 for a whole month because why not? I had a party with friends, I had a celebration with family on my actual birthday and I went to Vegas for a week. I managed to drink A LOT and  didn’t seem to get as drunk and no hangovers, well not as bad at least, I’d finally figured out how much I could handle or knew when I’d had enough, does that come with age?  Maybe it just took me a while.

Since then I can have sociable drinks, I’ll have wine on a Friday if I feel the need to wind down from the working week. Even if I do get a little tipsy, I now can finally enjoy having a drink without being ashamed of the state I’d end up in.

Rewind to last Saturday, Danielle and I went to our friend Kim’s for pre drinks, well, we had intended going out but after a few glasses of champagne that totally went straight to my head, I had to go home, sick. I realised later that I hadn’t eaten much all day and Danielle confessed she’d been topping my glass up because I was drinking too slow.  It was like being 17 again.

So for my health and fitness, for my friends who endure my drunken stupor, for Kevin who endures my whinging hangovers and for my safety (see above photo) I am retiring from alcohol…..until May the 21st anyway, Kim and Danielle I expect to see you pair at the finish line with a bottle of champagne chilling!

Can you relate to my relationship with alcohol? 

Have you ever done anything silly when under the influence?

Cheers to that!

Thanks for reading❤

Have a great day 😊

Angela xo

33 thoughts on “Going sober”

  1. After I spent my childhood watching what alcohol can do a person, I decided not to drink.
    Most people wouldn’t expect it but I’m 22 and I’ve never been drunk. To be honest I never had more than one cocktail with alcohol in it, I usually don’t drink at all.
    I’ve never regretted that decision.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am also a complete and total lightweight, but two things are different for me; first, I know exactly where my line is. I know exactly which drink is the one that will make me vomit. I’ve poured a lot of expensive drinks into potted plants and down toilets in an attempt to stay on the right side of that line without letting on! The second is that I don’t get hangovers. If I decide to blast through my limits, I vomit on the night. It’s gross. But the next day I feel fine!

    Your hangovers sound HORRIBLE and your poor, poor face! Looks so painful! I’ve been pretty lucky on the drunken shenanigans front. No broken bones, no stitches required… My housemate ended a night with a face very like yours though after tripping on a step, and my best friend broke her footo and then tried to “dance it off”, so I think maybe we run with similar crowds! I fully support your dry months head. I hope you’ve a lovely cocktail lined up for you in May!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wish I’d thought of disposing drinks like that, ha! i have on occasion been drinking water and pretended to my friends it was gin and tonic. I know, I was so lucky not to be left with serious injuries or disfigurement, I’m glad to hear your friends are like me, makes me feel kinda normal!!
      Thanks for the support, I’ll for sure be having a party after the marathon!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I am such a lightweight! I HATE throwing up, so when I drink, it’s usually a drink or two and that’s it. I’ve been pretty lame when it comes to alcohol. Now, anything with sulfites gives me migraines, so I’ve been off most alcohol. Lame.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I really need to do this. The Sunday before last I started vomiting at about 11am and didn’t stop until 6pm. I hadn’t been outrageously drunk and remember the whole night (I even cleaned the kitchen when I got home at 4am!) but my body clearly can’t handle what it used to. It was such a painful day physically and mentally. I think I need a 1-2 drink policy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ahh thats rough!!! Why do we continue to do it to ourselves? I always remember everything when I’m drunk, which in the past wasn’t always good. Yeah 1-2 drinks policy is good, but you know when the wine bottle is open and there’s only another couple left in it, its so easy to get carried away!


  5. Bravo to you! Your training for the marathon will be a whole lot easier without alcohol in your system. The older I have got the less I can handle and I am now at one glass of Prosecco or wine and that’s it otherwise I feel lightheaded and sleepy. So I now limit myself to one glass on a Sunday with my main meal (Monday is my training day off). Which marathon are you doing?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m a total lightweight! I accidentally got drunk last weekend and then had a beer on Wednesday night and told Jon I met my quota for the year! I used to drink a TON in college and then kind of tapered off to getting super smashed 1-2 times a month (which was less than in college!). And then I just quit drinking for the most part and have never really picked it back up! Good luck to you though! I feel like it’ll totally be doable, especially with a fitness goal that you’re working towards anyway!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I hope so! I’m good at making these bold statements then not actually following through but I feel like I can manage this, I’m turning down any invitations to go party from now until then. I’ve already had to decline two trips to Marbella, Spain for pre-wedding parties, which I’m ok about but probably when the girls actually go I’ll be gutted!!!
      My friends can drink, drink and drink some more I used to think there was something wrong with me, good to know other people are lightweights too!!!


  7. Great post! I got myself into really stupid and dangerous situations due to alcohol, especially when I was at Uni. I’m 38 now and still definitely enjoy a drink but my hangovers are much worse after less alcohol! So I try and be sensible. I think having extended periods of time not drinking when I was pregnant helped, they showed me that I could go out and not have to drink to have a good time. Best of luck with your non-drinking mission till May!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Great post! I have a tricky relationship with alcohol and tend to drink too much when I feel overwhelmed by the amount of people I’m around – at big parties, social events, etc.When I’m alone, a glass or two of wine is all I want, but it’s social events that makes it more challenging.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I was around many people in my family who socially drank for years. As for me, I am proud to say that I only use alcohol for cooking–white wine for certain chicken dishes helps heighten some flavor. Also, some people may find this a bit surprising–but inserting a can of beer with the froth inside a tall pot of chili makes for an awesome comfort meal during the winter months.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. My worst nightmare is usually waking up and realizing that you called people you shouldn’t have called and feel stupid about it, and then then feeling sick the whole day. i totally relate with your story, i have been through most of it.

    Liked by 1 person

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