Happiness · Lifestyle · Thoughts

Cómo estàs?

My running group leader, Mandy said we might feel depressed after the marathon. Committing so much of our time, energy and focus on that one thing for so long can leave you feeling a little lost when it all comes to a sudden halt.  The runners high of crossing that finish line sadly,  eventually does wear off and apparently it is unacceptable to wear the medal everyday for the rest of my life? Who knew?

Thankfully, my hiatus is not because I have fallen victim to Post Marathon Depression, although I miss my Saturday morning group run, I do not miss spending 3-4 hours running.  I am very happy and have been having a whale of a time (that’s a strange expression for a non-swimmer).  I have however felt a lack of inspiration and had zero motivation to write.  I tried reading back my old posts to see what I actually wrote about before marathon training, but that just made me cringe, ha!

I’ve had a well deserved rest.  I ran a whopping total of 3 miles in the last month, I use the term ‘ran’ very loosely.  I haven’t done much exercise at all and have instead invested my time in making memories with friends, family and my newly acquainted running buddies.  My facial muscles and abs hurt from laughing and smiling so I’m classing that as worthwhile exercise.

I have had SO much fun, still, I feel uninspired to write…

My head is bursting with fun, life-loving thoughts after crossing something so monumental off the old bucket list. Following it up with more awesomeness like well earned celebratory drinks with my run group, a triple dating sing along to a very convincing Elvis tribute act, recuperating with a glorious spa day with my best friends, re-igniting my social life with a girls trip to Spain that became a giggle-fest from start to finish, watching two of my dearest friends take their vows at the prettiest wedding ever, basking in extremely, rare Scottish sunshine and watching my twin nieces reach milestones that require baby-proofing EVERYTHING.

Equally, my head is filled with deeply powerful thoughts about recent terror attacks both close to home and further afield, politics (eye roll)  a general election that made me not want to use my right to vote, devastation for the victims and survivors of the Grenfell Tower fire and the painful news that one of my beautiful twin nieces will endure lifelong struggles with Cerebal Palsy.

A mixed bag of thoughts, highs and lows, things I’d typically share, even if just to look back on when I forget them in another few months… still I felt uninspired to write…

I have neglected commenting on my favourite bloggers posts and have barely logged into WordPress over the last month – I had to delete the WP app on my phone because ‘cannot take photo iPhone storage full’ became annoying pretty quickly.

Today I logged in and read this post.  Instantly reminding me how much I love reading other peoples memories and thoughts which gave me the motivation needed to write this post explanation of absence.

I am excited to get back into ‘blogging’ and to read about..to name just a few.. Brittany’s recent adventures in Ireland, Liz’s dream trip to Iceland (I’m waiting Liz) to laugh out loud at Fatty McCupcakes and The Captains Speech and to nod in agreement at Quinn’s Thoughts on… not forgetting some of my favourite running blogs, some of whom are beginning Marathon training… I can’t wait to follow training progress knowing my own is OVER, ha!

I’m back, the sun is shining my birthday MONTH is fast approaching and most importantly NO more marathon training updates **crowd cheers for abnormally long time

What have I missed guys? Let me know what you’ve been up to!

Thanks For Reading😊

Have a Great Day❤️

Angela xo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fitness · Running · Thoughts · Uncategorized

The Marathon is not on Race Day

The marathon is…

 300+ miles over 5 months of training runs, dedicating time 4-5 days a week to running, long runs that get longer every week, adjusting your diet, testing race nutrition, testing kit, hydrating, running hills, speed training, adjusting your pace, driving routes to make water drops the night before a long run, muscle cramps, tightness, niggles, injuries, foam rolling and sports massages.  

…race day is just the finish line

The marathon is the mental battle…

I can’t do this!  I can’t even run a 2 hour half marathon!  I’m too slow!  I’m not even a real runner!  I can’t do it! Why am I struggling on a 4 mile run when I managed 15 miles just 2 days ago? I’m at the back of the group again! I’m done in! The injured runners are passing me! I can’t do it! The older people are faster than me! I can’t do this! I can’t look at that 20 miles on my programme it scares me!  26.2 miles is a really long way! Why did I sign up for this! I’ve missed a training run I’m never going to do it! I’m too tired to run today!

…and overcoming it when you run 20 miles with energy left in you to continue and your head is finally screaming YES, YES, YES YOU CAN DO IT!

The marathon is watching your body change..

I have lost some upper body strength, the definition in my arms gone and my abs are hidden under a layer of fat, my tummy is more round thanks to ALL the carbs and from me being extremely nieve thinking I could eat everything in sight because I’d be running it off later.  My thighs are bigger, my legs are stronger.  I have ugly dead skin on my feet from blisters on blisters, all ten have survived but my toenails are cut to a millimetre of life, I have marks from chafing in VERY delicate areas,  there’s a white band on my wrist where my Garmin sits. My face has taken a beaten from the ever changing weather and I have aches and pains to rival my 90 year old neighbour.

…but loving it more than you ever have because you’ve watched it do amazing things week after week.

The marathon is running in Scottish weather…

It’s true in Scotland we see all four seasons in a day whatever the season but training from November to May means running in the dark, in snow, on ice, against head wind, tail wind and blow you of the kerb wind, rain in all directions and most recently the sunshine.  You’ll have suffered overdressing and stripping layers mid run or under dressing and coming home blue and shivering.

….I think our finishers T-shirts should read I TRAINED THROUGH STORM DORIS. 

The marathon is dealing with the pains and niggles..

I was no exception to this, I didn’t lose toenails, suffer shin splints or even migraines like some of my run buddies did but I had my fair share of pains.  There was an issue with my foot that I feared was a metatarsal stress fracture which randomly disappeared.  Followed by trouble with the IT band at my left knee, I’ve had it before but never as painful as I felt on the last mile of our 17 mile long run thanks to an almighty steep decline from the Ochil Hills.  I could barely walk that last mile and it threw me out for my 18 mile run.  I thought then it was game over for me.  I was already slow but to miss a week or so of training so near the end would definitely ruin my marathon. 

…and realising that you are pushing your body further than you ever have of course it’s going to complain.

The marathon is accepting what you can’t control…

The dodgy knee/IT band did not mean I was out but I do have to run slower than I would have liked this means any time goal I had was quite simply disregarded and my goal became crossing the finish line.  I found this hard to accept as my running group are still all aiming for the same time goal we set at the beginning of training.

The weather, well we can barely even predict the weather here and unfortunately it can have a huge impact on how your race goes.  I’ve had to abandon many a training run because I’m soaked to the skin or it wasn’t sunny when I left but now my shoulders are burning.  It’s a case of dealing with what elements are thrown at you on the day.

Some runs are good and some runs are bad, I myself am pretty inconsistent and can’t ever pinpoint what causes a bad run, unfortunately sometimes even race day just isn’t a good run day.

…you’ve just got to go with the flow.

The marathon is ignoring the doubters and not comparing…

I know a lot of good runners who are not running the marathon, some of whom are judging people that are running the marathon… For being bucket listers and not real runners, questioning why we would bother to do it if we know we won’t get a good time, not training sufficiently blah, blah, blah.  I’m a bucket lister because I’ve learned through training that this distance is probably not for me.  For this race I’m also a charity runner.  I won’t get what a runner considers a ‘good time’ and I’m ok with that.  I’m running in a race but I’m not racing there’s a difference.  I compete with myself and no-one else.  I run with a group of girls who can all run faster than I can and I wish them nothing but the best and can’t wait to see how well they do and I know they all wish the same for me.

…26.2 miles is an achievement regardless of how long it takes. 

Good Luck if you are running this weekend.  

I have scheduled this post to publish as I cross the start line (…except I actually forgot to publish it…) So you can read it while I’m pounding the tarmac around Stirlingshire with Liz McGolgan and Zola Budd…well they’ll be pretty far in front of me, ha! 


My goals for my first (and last) marathon…

A. Sub 4hrs 30 minutes 😂 the knee claimed that one.  A(2) Cross the finish line, hopefully sub 5hr but not putting pressure on myself.

B. Do not die, poo or pee myself.

C. Enjoy the atmosphere, maybe take a selfie or two.

D. Smile for race photos and not be ugly crying in my finishers photo.

Ahhhhhhhhh it’s RACE DAY! 

Thanks for reading 😊

Have a great day❤️

Angela xo

Lifestyle · Thoughts · Travel

Past Adventures • What happened in Vegas?

The Mr is currently on a flight home from a stag party in Las Vegas, communication has been sparse over the last 6 days, yes 6 days for a stag party? Ridiculous right?  After the intial  ‘At hotel. Alive’ text to confirm they had a safe journey I heard nothing for 48 hours then received a random photo of his Ceasars Palace bathroom followed by one of his eggs benedict, steak, ribs , potato and melon breakfast, a day later one of the stag with a Mike Tyson-esque eye tattoo (apparently its henna) and another this morning of Mr himself at a gun range holding some sort of weapon of mass destruction.  I’m pretty sure I won’t get much conversation tonight as I imagine he will probably collapse into a coma for the next few days to recover from the lost of sleep and alcohol consumption.*

Since he has been gone I’ve found myself reminiscing about a trip we made to Sin City for my 30th birthday.  Now, I must confess, my previous past adventures posts have not been written entirely from memory, I used to jot things down in a journal because I have a terrible memory.  Vegas however, I wrote nothing.  Not. A Thing.  I must have taken that quote  ‘What happens in Vegas goes on Facebook stays in Vegas.’ quite literally.

Thankfully I do have some photos I was tagged in on Facebook to jog my memory of what actually happened in Vegas..

August 2013 

•Despite visiting Ireland many times and it being widely available here in Scotland, I had my first taste of Guinness in Las Vegas.

It wasn’t for me but that might have been something to do with drinking it at 8am.

•Came close to being frostbit 

•Travelled the world in less than a mile.


•Feared for my life at a shooting range.


I fired a Pink Hello Kitty AK47, a must have for any 10 year old girl!?!? What the.. only in Vegas…I hope!

•Took my first (and last) helicopter flight

•Partied like a rockstar princess

•Rocked out to Queen in Fremont Street

•Solved a murder

•Put it all on black…and lost.

Would you believe red 30 came out and we were all wearing my birthday T-shirts with a red 30 on them! 

Las Vegas hadn’t actually ever been on my wishlist, I’m too much of a beach lover, but I read somewhere that Vegas is the adult version of Disneyland and I had always dreamed of a birthday party at Disneyland so it seemed fitting**
The Disneyland comparison was practically spot on.  I realised this as I strolled up and down the strip in awe at the size of the hotels saying ‘wow look at that!’ every 20 steps, just like you’d do in the happiest place on earth.  There are even rides.  I unfortunately was too scared to take on any of the rides at the top of the Stratosphere, the Slotzilla zip line in Fremont Street hadn’t opened yet nor had the High Roller at the Linq but I did brave the old faithful yellow cab rollercoaster in New York New York, with a hangover may I add.  The monorail was just as frightening and the incline elevator in the Luxor was more likely to make you throw up (I could not get used to that thing).  If like me you are boring not much of an adrenaline junkie you could opt for a relaxing ride in a gondola in the Venetian, but I’d recommend you go for the indoor option, we didn’t and it was HOT out! 

You might not shake hands with Mickey Mouse (actually you might) but you will see lots of familiar characters.  In fact one of my memorable Vegas moments was seeing a fight break out between Michael Jackson and Big Bird from Sesame St, I wish I’d stuck around to see who won, although I heard Batman swooped in to sort the situation out.

So you see it’s a lot like Disneyland if you just turn a blind eye to the gambling, alcohol, nightclubs, strip shows, hookers and so many naked people.

It’s a fun, wild and crazy place!  After a day or two you become immune to the Vegas craziness, sitting at a slot machine with Elvis to the left and a newlywed bride in full bridal wear to the right becomes completely normal.  As for the nightclubs we quickly caught on to the fact that girls recieved preferential treatment, bait to get guys in I guess.  We were a group of 3 girls and 3 guys and us ladies got in to all the clubs for free and most places offered us free drinks, the guys had to pay to top dollar… I felt guilty about that…for a second.

If celebrity spotting is your thing, you might be in luck.  One Direction had a show when were there and we spotted them on the way back to our hotel one afternoon, they were hard to miss as there was a mass of screaming teenagers around them. Less conspicuous, Pharrel Williams was partying in Pure at Ceasars Palace, Donna spotted him as we headed to the rooftop in a glass elevator.  Donna and I also went to see Bruno Mars in concert (that’s where I became a fan) we were hoping to go to the after party he was attending but it was our last night in Sin City and we reluctantly headed to bed after the show admitting defeat. Vegas always wins.

And that’s what happened in Vegas.  We weren’t too wild (not sure I can say the same for Kevin’s recent trip)  I didn’t get married, apparently I did make a marriage proposal to Kevin as we strolled passed the chapel in our hotel at 5.30am… too much tequila, obviously.  We didn’t trash our room, steal a tiger or inherit a baby and there was no memory loss, well maybe a little fuzziness.


I can’t really make recommendations from (my terrible) memory but here are a few things I remember really loving.

Mon Ami Gabi – Paris Hotel

French restaurant.  We had our evening meal here the food and service were fantastic and sitting outside on the patio we had an amazing view of the bellagio fountains.

Papillon Helicopter Tours

We took the Grand Canyon Evening Celebration tour, a glass of fizz in the canyon and the sunset over the strip on the return. I was terrified but it was an amazing experience and our pilot was great.
House of Blues – Mandalay Bay

I can’t remember what the food was like but the live music was AMAZING and we got a free bucket of beers because it was Birthday!

YOLO – Planet Hollywood

The best frozen margaritas I ever had.

I really enjoyed reliving this, I don’t have this much fun anymore now that I’m old! Ha!

Have you ever partied in Las Vegas?

Thanks for reading 😊
Have a great day❤️

Angela xo
*I stand corrected, he didn’t stop speaking for nearly 2 hours.  I almost feel like I was on the trip with him (although I’m sure he missed some parts out).

**I actually don’t consider myself much of an adult and I don’t think Disneyland is just for kids (that is ageist) I’m holding out for my 40th birthday party there.

Lifestyle · Thoughts

Song Roulette

I stole borrowed this idea from Paul, although in my defence he did request his readers do the same, to give him ideas for new music.  This was right up my street as I am aiming to run a marathon this year, I am always looking for new music to add to my playlist, just imagine how many hours of training I have to put in, ugh….that’s a lengthy playlist I’ll need.  ALSO Santa brought me a new ipod shuffle and a record player, so lots of free space for new music and a new love for vinyl. I’m rambling…


I LOVE music,  I like a wide range its not uncommon for me to rock out to AC/DC then participate in car kareoke to Taylor Swift, also,  don’t lie you know you have all least head bopped to Justin Beiber song, EVERYONE has.  I’m rambling again..

Songs are great for triggering memories, (even for me who has the worst memory ever) which is pretty much the aim of this game, play songs on shuffle and write the first thing that you think of.

**Using my iPhone music library which I mostly use it for running/working out, so you might find that the majority of my songs are the type to get you pumped up for a workout or dance.  Wear sensible shoes before reading any further, better still put your workout gear on.

 

Omi -Cheerleader

Kinda embarrassed I have this, Ha. It reminds me of my Mum, my sister and I caught her singing along to it one day but she was singing the wrong words ‘Oh, I think that I found myself a jelly bear’ NO MUM its cheerleader!!! Jamaican accents are clearly not her strong point!!

Bruno Mars -Uptown Funk

This reminds me of a Christmas party with the work girls a couple of years ago, we had already had a few (too many) cocktails when this song came on,  we hit the dance floor like no one was watching and had the best time. Ha.  You can’t help but not dance to this, right?

Michael Jackson -Thriller

OK this song makes me run fast! I was a bit of a Jacko fan back in the day but everytime I hear this I think of the first time I saw the Thriller music video, I’m pretty sure I was about 5years old.  My best friend, Wendy (who lived next door) and I seen it on TV at her house just before we left hers to go to mine for a sleepover, we ran so fast to my house as it was getting dark outside and slammed the door shut behind us, holding it closed with our butts for a good 10minutes.  We were so scared. HaHa

Calvin Harris -Drinkin from the Bottle

This takes me back to Las Vegas for my 30th birthday, I wish I could tell you more but you know… what happens in Vegas…

Kenny Rogers -The Gambler

My friend Danielle sings this REALLY BADLY every time she gets drunk and there is a microphone in the area.  She fell out with me once at a party when she overheard me saying to the DJ to keep the mic away from her!

Lady GaGa -Just Dance

I went to a Pussycat Dolls concert with my friend Deborah, I’m not a PCD fan, I am just a good friend.  Anyway, we ended up being pretty late and missing the support act… Lady Gaga.  Just Dance had just been released that week, Deborah was like ‘Its fine who even is Lady Gaga?’.. oh that’s the girl that sings that ‘where are my keys, I lost my phone’ song… if only we knew!!! We laugh now, remember that time we missed a superstar!!

Oasis- Champagne Supernova

This reminds me of an Oasis gig I went to (21 years ago!!!!) I could not see anything other than the back of people for the whole gig and came home with a black eye after being accidently elbowed in the eye…being 4ft11 sucks sometimes!  I also remember some guys throwing cups of pee around in the crowd. Ewwww.   Strangely, I can actually remember telling my Mum I had a great time. Ha

Drake -Hold On, We’re Going Home

My sisters and I on a road trip to the beach singing in the car a few summers back!

Ray Charles – I got a Woman

One of my favourite movies Ray……and annoyingly also the Kanye West song Golddigger, for obvious reasons!

Paolo Nutini -Pencil Full of Lead

This doesn’t ignite a particular memory but it always makes me happy and think of my younger sister!
Kanye West & Jay Z – H*A*M

This song reminds me of my boxing class, I’m not sure I’ve even heard it there before but it gets you all geared up for punching stuff, no? or maybe just killing it in the gym.

Carly Simon – You’re So Vain

Does this remind everyone of the movie How to lose a Guy in 10 Days? In particular it reminds me of the yellow silk dress Andie (Kate Hudson) wears in it.

Eazy-E -Boyz-N-The Hood

This reminds me of ghetto blasters, remember those MASSIVE sound systems in the 80’s are they even called ghetto blasters maybe we just called them that, boom boxes, portable Hi-Fi maybe?  Anyway some of the older boys in my street would play those in the summer and blast out songs like this one  #thuglife… and so my love for rap was born.  Come to think of it that song really wasn’t exactly appropriate for my age group in the 80’s!!

Kodaline -The One

My friend Deborah’s wedding, this was her and her husbands first dance song and I always think of their wedding when I hear it.

Amy Winehouse – Tears Dry on their Own

We were a party at my older sisters house, Kevin and I hadn’t been together very long and he was really quiet and pretty shy around my family .  I’m not sure if he had too much to drink (he doesn’t change much when he is drunk) but he ended up playing Singstar on the Playstation and wouldn’t let anyone else have a go, we couldn’t get the mic off him, ha I remember him singing this,  at the time it was one of my favourites..now it just reminds me of him sounding like a cat being strangled!

Paolo Nutini – New Shoes

This reminds me of 2014 T in the Park music festival.  I had a stage clash,  where Paolo was playing on one stage and someone else I really wanted to see was playing on another stage (I can’t even remember who it was now) I decided to watch half of each and made it back to Paolo just as he started singing this song.

Nirvana – Dumb

I was a bit young for them when they were around but I pretended I was a massive Nirvana fan because I liked to copy my big sister, (I was 10)  pretty dumb huh! Ha… I actually did like the music as I got older though!

Eminem – Stan

This transports me to my final year at High School, we had a common room that all 6th year students used during free periods to play poker and chat study.  This song was huge that year as was Eminem, so it always reminds me of hanging out  studying in there with my friends.

There you have it some of my playlist memories!  I’m pretty confused as to why there were no Beyonce or David Bowie songs on the list, I’m sure my library is made up of 80% Queen Bey and Bowie!!!

Let me know if you decide to do this too, I’d love to read some more and steal new tunes for my playlist. I’m sure Paul won’t mind.

Thanks for reading❤

Happy Monday, have a great day😊

Angela xo

 

 

 

Lifestyle · Thoughts

2016 -Season Finale

It happens every January 31st, I find myself in a slight state of shock that the year is over! Where has the time gone?!

I honestly didn’t have a whole lot to recap this year life has been pretty, uneventful for me, however, I had a LOT of special moments this year to celebrate with my family, mostly my sisters, memories I’ll cherish forever.

For Auld Lang Syne…

2016 was the year my little sister got married, she also turned 30, my big sister became Mummy when she gave birth to my beautiful twin nieces Amber & Harper.  In turn my already, awesome family expanded by 3 awesome new members. There was further celebrations this year when Kevin ended the year championship winner.  Scottish Fiesta ST Champion 2016

Fun things in 2016 included seeing Beyonce live, a long weekend in Liverpool with Kevin, my sisters Hen weekend and an abundance of good times with friends.

Run things in 2016….well, with no races entered I started the year off with little challenges for myself, I ran 5k everyday in January….and not much else after that, until very recently.  Here’s hoping next year has more to report on in the running category, like a completed marathon perhaps…hopefully.

I’m done with resolutions, let’s be honest who sticks to them after January anyway?

Globally 2016 has been a bit of a riot, war in Syria, Trump and I’m still not over Brexit to name a few,  but personally, uneventful or not I have nothing to complain about, I mean, I kinda wish there had been some foreign travel in there and more running in 2016, but mostly I am so thankful to have enjoyed another year HAPPY, HEALTHY & LOVED.
I wish you all a Happy New Year and hope 2017 brings you an abundance of good health, love and happiness.

Do you have any New Years resolutions?

What did you do to say goodbye to 2016 and welcome in 2017?

I’m Scottish we party hard….I’m not even going out tonight haha! Sláinte Mhath!

Thanks for reading❤️

Happy Hogmanay 😊


Angela xo

Thoughts

“So this is Christmas… war is NOT over..”

It’ s Christmas Day on Sunday 4 more sleeps!

I love Christmas, I get as excitied as I did when I was 5.  My Christmas parties are done and dusted, the tree is happily twinkling in our family room, my gift shopping is complete, I have eaten my weight in mince pies, drunk more gingerbread lattes than I care to mention and the carpet of glittering, frost returned this morning but I’m just not feeling my festive spirit this year at all.

If you have seen the news recently and are HUMAN you probably feel the same way.  The media coverage from Syria and Yemen is painfully, heartbreaking and making it difficult to find much importance in anything I do in my day to day life, let alone spreading the Christmas cheer.  I just feel so helpless and so angry.

Angry that our government appear to be doing nothing to help, angry that directly and/or indirectly they  have caused this and/or have allowed it to happen and kinda annoyed that a picture I post on Facebook from my Christmas party gets over 100 likes and comments yet the links I share the next day to donate to Yemen and to Syrian aid gets 0…..yes zero, not even one of my 484 Facebook ‘friends’ liked that post, commented or shared it. None.  Do people not care?  Is humanity dead? 

I am aware that worldwide there is conflict, war, famine and all sorts of humanitarian crisis’ all year round probably since life began but it’s just so easy for us, we’re far enough away not be affected, to forget or put it to the back of our minds.  

I am making a conscious effort to not force this horror to the back of my mind but to accept that the world we live in is neither safe nor privileged, that I am simply  fortunate to have been born where I was.

I’m not going to tell you that you should donate you can do that if you wish. Just try to keep them in your mind, pray for them if you pray,  be grateful for everything you have as they are forced to go without, practice love not hate, be the change you want to see in the world.  Start within.

We Failed Them..

Lifestyle · Thoughts

Just be.

Unlike my sisters, I have never been career driven.  In fact in my final year of High School, had you asked me what I wanted to be, you’d have received a different answer depending on what day it was or whether I’d watched Ally McBeal, C.S.I or Sex and the City the night before.

That time I was recruited to be a CSI, ha

When I was choosing my final subjects at High School, my guidance teacher asked me what I wanted to be, I said a teacher.  I don’t know why I said that, I did not want to be a teacher it was just the first thing that came into my head that wouldn’t provoke disapproving looks from both him and my mother who sat next to me.  I still don’t know what’s wrong with wanting to work in the coffee shop I worked in at the time? Or being a roadie for 50cent?…. I can just imagine my mothers face if I’d actually said that. Haha jokes!
I am by no means blowing my own trumpet but I left school with 6 Highers without trying, I barely studied, I failed to hand homework in on time, on occasion I skipped class.  I just was not interested in school at all!  My teachers and my parents would get frustrated with me, I guess they knew I could have done well if I’d actually applied myself. Sorry Mum!

From the subjects I studied at the time (Engligh, Maths, French, Chemistry, Music & Art) I said Art was my favourite, probably because it involved less concentration and effort which is why I ended up at University studying Interior Architecture (not teaching, lol).  I can’t really remember if I really wanted to go to Uni, if it was just because my friends were going or it felt like that’s the thing you do after High School but off I went.  I liked my course but again I didn’t really make as much effort as I probably could have.  I loved the social life at uni, I loved the class trips (Paris, Rome, Barcelona & NYC) and after 4 years studying…well not so much of the studying, I left with my degree.

I sort of landed myself a job as an Assistant Interior Designer for a company in Edinburgh and it was there I learned how much I lacked that ambition that everyone else in the industry had.  The girls I worked with had a career plan they knew what they wanted and they were going to get it.  I just didn’t have that passion.  Don’t get me wrong I went to work everyday and did my job to a high standard but I wasn’t competitive enough  by nature to work in the design industry.  I was told this many times at University, I knew this already though.  I was never the kid that cried if I didn’t win because I honestly just didn’t ever care enough.  At work my boss would take glory for my ideas and it really didn’t bother me, I let her.  I hated being front line I’d much rather be a minion in the background.  I definitely am not one of those natural leader types.

When the company relocated to Hong Kong I didn’t jump at the chance to move with them like the others.  I quit.  I got a job in my hometown in an office “just until I found another in my chosen field”….except I didn’t even bother looking and I still work in that office now 10 years later.  I don’t love my job but I don’t hate it.  I work hard, I am a good employee (blowing my own trumpet again)but I’m really not passionate about what I do.  To me it’s a job, a way to pay the bills and allow me to enjoy my free time.

I’ve never been driven by money or success.  People judge me on this but I don’t care, people are genuinely shocked when I say I don’t have a 5 year plan, I never have.  An ex actually broke up with me for it.  He put his life on hold to prioritise and achieve his dream and couldn’t understand why I didn’t have the fire in my belly to do the same.  I guess we were both at complete opposite ends of the scale. Haha.

Money, possessions and success are not important to me.  I practice gratitude daily, not because I follow any type of holistic lifestyle but because I grew up living with with someone who has poor health and inturn a poor quality of life so it’s hard not be grateful every damn day and I believe this to be the reason I am happy to just be.   Gratitude is the key to happiness guys!

Kevin on the other hand has his own business, since I’ve known him that’s what he’s wanted.  In his free time he drives a race car and I know that if money was no option that is what he would want to do every day.  He is so passionate about it that I know it’ll hurt when he has to give it up when we have a mortgage to pay.  As much as I sometimes complain that his race car is a time consuming, money-eating hobby, I do love to see how happy it makes him when he stands on that podium and takes his trophy.

Just last week when we were discussing him giving up racing at the end of the season he said to me.  “Have you never had something you were really passionate about?” ……No, not really!

I laughed after I said no because it reminded me of when my friend was dating she would text me a colour based on her first impressions of her date. eg. Beige=Average,Boring.  Red=Hot, interesting.  Am I beige? Am I really not that interested in anything?

I know a few of the Olympians in Rio  with Team GB at the moment.  I wonder how they feel reaching goals they’ve been working for their whole lives and I honestly can’t comprehend wanting something so badly that you sacrifice so much of your life to achieve it. Kudos to them, they are all an absolute inspiration.  Side note: go follow Usain Bolt on snapchat he makes me smile every freaking day.

So here I am currently pondering all the things that I love, trying to find out if there is something that makes me tick? Something that could potentially become a hobby that I’m truly passionate about or a career that feels like my calling.  Am I missing out on things in life because of this lack of interest? I don’t feel like I am but how do I know?  I read everywhere about people who quit corporate jobs they have worked for years to become a yoga teacher, people who sell their homes and possessions to travel the world and let’s be honest social media is pretty much filled with cheesy inspiration quotes advising us to chase our dreams….what if you don’t have one?

Or maybe I am I just reading too much into it all….

Hmmmm….

Do you have a career or hobby that you are really passionate about?

Did you aim to achieve goals from a young age? Or did you find your passion later in life?



Thanks so much for reading 😊

Have a fabulous weekend❤️

Angela xo